So Rundown

I am so tired of my baby not sleeping. I am tired of her only sleeping on me. I am tired of her waking up every 2.5 hours. I am tired of her fighting sleep. I am tired of feeling like a less than capable mother. I don’t know what I am doing wrong. I love my girl dearly, but I feel so broken down. Sorry for the vent post, but I needed to just let this out somewhere. 💔

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This sucks. How old is she? Maybe I can suggest some things depending on her age?

I am sorry your going through all of this as I am going through it as well! I have started to trh and stick to a routine with my daughter who is 10weeks old and that seems to help. We go upstairs around 7/8pm she gets a bottle and gets into pjs then we read a book and i put her sound machine on and her swaddle as she isnt rolling over yet and then she is asleep usually by 830/9 she slept for the first time in her bassinet the other night, but last night wanted to sleep with me so we follow the 7 safe sleep method for cosleeping. It will get better and trust me I get it im a single mother I dont get help often especially at night! I have barley slept the past few days but it does get better! I know they say try to sleep whenever she does which is easier said than done. I hope all goes welif you need to talk to someone please feel free to message me!

How old is baby? I'm the same 5.5 months. It's so hard. But it will pass. By summer time things will be different
Hang in there xxx

This sucks...but she is a baby and waking every 2.5 hours and wanting to be on you is biologically normal, albeit exhausting for you. This stage will pass.

she’s 7 months

We did the Merlin’s magic sleep suit for a few months it would help her with the reflex in her sleep. Now she naps in a zipadee swaddle that keeps her arms from startling her. I don’t co sleep unless she wakes up in the middle of the night and won’t go back to sleep. At night she sleeps in her halo sleep sack

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I'm sorry you're struggling! First, know that it's biologically normal for your baby to wake up and for her to want to sleep with you. You're not doing anything wrong! You sound like a good and capable mom who has been hurt by our messed up, unrealistic cultural expectations around infant sleep!

For suggestions, you posted in the bedsharing group so how are you bedsharing now? I have found bedsharing to have absolutely saved my sleep but it sounds like it's not helping you? Maybe we can troubleshoot.

It’s hard, and it’s ok to vent. I found the book Precious Little Sleep to be helpful. There is a Facebook group by the same name and you can post your baby’s schedule there and get feedback from other parents as well as the author. I find it helpful to know what others are doing.

Thanks all for the advice! I have tried almost everything it seems and nothing works. I am most likely just gonna wait her out until her sleep cycles start to lengthen on their own. Im going to keep trying to get her off of me and onto the bed next to me too. Just some days are much rougher than others and today was a real rough one.

My wee girl is a terrible sleeper too! We have actually booked a sleep consultant to see if they can help as I find things too overwhelming while trying to help her sleep myself! I now feel bad cause she yawns all day long and is upset everytime she wakes up during night or naps. You can message me and I’ll let you know how the sleep consultant goes it starts in two weeks, we paid about £260. Hang in there 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding