Vent

You need to have a serious talk with him about parental duties. You both are her parents, not just you. If he isn't willing to understand and try to help a little more, then you need to figure out what you are willing to accept in your relationship and family dynamic. It is hard for men at first because they don't really understand babies like moms do. He may become an amazing helper/daddy as your daughter near 2 years old and becomes more of her own person. Just know, you are not alone.

So I agree with about having a talk with your husband about parental responsibilities. What exactly does he think you do? Especially if he isn't doing the things that you listed doing? How does your husband help contribute? It seems like he probably had an attitude that you were asking him to be with your daughter while you did something for yourself. Which totally isn't fair, especially if he's been going out every night since you've been there.

Now what I don't agree with is him becoming an amazing father once she's near 2yrs old. Some men are just lazy. Just like it can be hard for men, it's can also be hard for women. We don't just automatically know and understand children just because we carried them. Our bond is different with them yes, but that doesn't just automatically make us more capable. Too often men are allowed to be lazy and all the work falls on mom, and moms end up burnt out, often leaving men not understanding why a woman doesn't want to be intimate etc.

Have a talk with him and see how yall can work things out. But definitely reflect on what you want your relationship to look like in the future and if this is what you want long term, if he never changes

Listen here. Your husband is not a third child for you too also look after. In your case.. what he thinks like he’s still single and unmarried?? Like wtf?!Husbands/fathers/men should step up automatically when baby comes into this world. I’m not going to repeat what the other ladies said just that they are all correct and I agree with what they all say. I’m so so sorry you’re in this situation it’s not great, sending you strength and know that you are an amazing mom and a great wife and your husband doesn’t deserve you. ❤️‍🩹 🫶🏽❤️

Has your husband been left for a night to take care of baby on his own? Might help their bond and also make him appreciate how much you do the he doesn’t see. Oh and you get a night away.
Sending love and support. We have a 7MO and my husband is only just starting to step up to the extent that I need him to. I had a weekend away with my girls and when I came back my husband seemed much more confident and has since stopped asking me everything little thing he has to do.
You got this! Set boundaries. I agree with previous comments, he is not another child for you to look after.
Have you reached out to see if he is looking for escape? He might be overwhelmed and not know how to respond to new feelings that he has. Just a thought…

He's behaving like he doesn't have kids and he's single! You need to have a serious talk with him. If he's not willing to improve, I'd seriously consider ending this relationship and sue him for child support.

no he has never watch her through the night and I have never gone out with friends or shopping alone.

What was he like before yall had the baby? Is he helpful around the house? Did you have an active social life and hobbies outside of your husband? What makes you not go shopping alone? Or out with friends? Your whole life and persona can't just be your baby.

He has changed through the years … use to have a heart of gold. Until he got caught with someone else. From then on it’s been getting worse through the years and I regret not being stronger before bringing a child. This is my fault and from the choices I have made

Aaah ok ok. Now we getting down to the REAL problem. He's a former cheater, who might not even want to really be with you honestly. So he cheated, you stayed and now he's a dick towards you sometimes, yall had a baby and he doesn't help enough.

Well what you have to ask yourself, would you want this for your daughter? If not then what are you going to do about it? You don't have to stay in a relationship that is making you unhappy, making you feel undervalued, and is draining. Let's work on our self esteem and truly think about how we want our future to look

Definitely lost myself and scared all the time. He just is not a nice man anymore… unless people are around him he acts amazing

I understand being scared, change isn't easy and there are a lot of women who lose themselves in marriage and motherhood. But what do you want for yourself? Do you want things to continue as they are? Or do you want to be strong not just for yourself but also note daughter and get the courage to stand up and do better for yourself