Baby Daddy

So my son is almost 1 years old and I was on the phone with his father and he was telling me that our son is going be “soft” because he cry’s when new people hold him or around him he said I have him spoiled but he only seen our son once and that was a few days ago and then he told me he didn’t want to see him again until he is 2 years old because he thinks he will know him better and then he said if had him more he will teach our son to be a little tough…how he going to do all that if he barely sees him I’m just lost for words because he just a baby how can my baby be “soft” just because he cry’s

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

He’s a baby. Babies aren’t supposed to be “tough” he needs to take parenting and therapy classes. I’d keep my kid away from that type of mentality.

Congratulations you will never see him again would be my response

My baby dad dead and he knew better than to talk about his own kids that way

Only thing I hate is when someone tells my boy he needs to stop crying and tough it out I tell them he is fine just the way he is and of course limit the time they spend with them cause they ain’t gunna tell my son he needs to toughen up so he can be like these men now a days where they can’t control their feelings cause no one taught them too they were taught to suck it up

Did your baby daddy hold him too fast or something? I think it’s very normal to have a good amount of stranger danger and for people to earn that connection in time. That’s what I allow in my daughter who is the same age and I find she is getting more confident as I allow her to slowly warm up to everyone. Idk, this kinda triggers me that your baby daddy would say that just based off what you wrote. Its normal to slowly warm up to people especially when you are 1 years old , ya know

Toxic masculinity in a nutshell

I would tell him don’t blame the child for lack of a good father who knows how to parent and love properly, he just don’t like strangers which is normal.

Pause.. how could the father that's barely around your son tell him how he's going to be? Then states he wants to wait until he's 2 to be around??? Ding ding ding... He's a deadbeat making an excuse for accountability on his end and wants you to suffer. So here's my advice coming from someone who's experienced something similar ( his father said he will not remember anything until he's older so it's best to come around then 😒). Put that man -boy on child support if you haven't already, get a consistent visitation schedule through the court and go about your life. Thrive for you and your son because clearly he has mommy issues 😌

He’s…. A baby? Is your baby daddy an idiot? lol wtf thas the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard 🤣

That is the most toxic thing I’ve ever heard, while not only trying to make excuses for himself to be a deadbeat absent father, he’s also calling a BABY SOFT for crying?! 🥹 what a POS

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

Calpol

My mum has just given my 4 year old calpol because he asked for it. He isn’t poorly (although was last week, been fine this week) he just likes the taste of it. My mum didn’t check, didn’t ask, just gave it to him and when I’ve questioned her she said “he asked for it”. Then quizzed 4 year old who said he asked for it because it tastes nice.

How would you react?