Handling money for kids

Please comment options and opinions! My husband has just had a promotion and we’re able to finally start saving money. We want to make sure our kids have a good start to their adulthood but not sure whether to a) put money consistently in their accounts for them to access at a certain age, or b) keep the money in our “war chest” so when they want to do big things like buy a car, they have to put some of their own money (weekend job, birthday money etc.) and we can decide how much we’d contribute. I grew up with option b but my parents were emotionally immature so this has left a lasting impact on feeling like I was being policed on things I wanted to do, a pattern I’m trying to break with my own children. My husband didn’t grow up with any money so doesn’t have an opinion - any advice on how to help him develop one would also be appreciated!

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We save the child benefits we get the from the government, it goes into an account for him and we don’t touch it, we also got him some Shares

I think a is better longer term.

But to cater to option b at a certain age split how much you're putting into the account and continue to put in but then also put some in the war chest.

I believe in general creating a system where they earn some $ (jobs, chores, gift money) gets split into a couple different categories. I like "spend", "share", "save", "invest". The spend category is the "I'm going to a store or yard sale or fair and I spend what I want ( within reason) on what I want." If it's a candy bar sure but not 100 candy bars or I want to get extra tickets to ride rides sure but not go and buy tickets for every person I've ever met. This is the I'm allowed to treat myself how I see fit so I can learn to prioritize and still take care of me. The share category is for giving- buying presents for friends birthday parties, getting Christmas gifts for family, donating to charity or church. It's sharing to show there are people beyond yourself. The save is to meet a goal. Something big- computer, car,

Holiday trip, overpriced tickets. This teaches to toward goals and that the amount of effort put in allows the goals to be met.

The invest is to work toward future self. It can be in an actual investment fund or mutual fund or cd or stock of some sort or into a company or small business. This teaches to be aware of the future to know that the world isn't controlled but to still have hope. It can help lead to entrepreneurship if they invest in a small business.

in our community

Is that true? Nursery/ school teachers

I was chatting with a friend who works with children, and we got onto the topic of nurseries and schools in the UK. I mentioned that I’m not very familiar with the system and that I’ve seen stories about bullying and teachers not always stepping in, which worries me. So I asked her how situations like that are usually handled.

She then said something that really stuck with me. She believes that staff sometimes form opinions about parents based on things like how they dress, where they go on holiday, what activities their child does, and how they respond to issues at school. According to her, parents who seem more “easy going” or less affluent may not always be taken as seriously, while more assertive or well off parents might receive more attention for their children.

My friend is one of those people who looks this things and I noticed during the past years, but I’m the opposite I don’t set opinions on those things, so I just wanted to know if there is any truth to this in your experience?

Are family members entitled to your kids

I need to know if me and my husband are making the right decision for our family.

If you and your sibling have a history of really bad fights that turn verbally and mentally abusive, your sibling has disrespected your partner multiple times, are you going to talk about it, forgive and forget and still allow them in your child’s life or push them away because you won’t allow that behaviour around your child. And does them being family give them any right to having a relationship with your kids

Nursery fee’s (UK)

How much (may I ask) is everyone who pays for nursery actually paying.
As of April our fee’s have increased but I must admit I’m in shock and embarrassed if anything to admit we can’t afford the additional £65 a month it is costing us.

We currently pay £161 now, our son goes
8am-6pm Monday and Friday. As we both work obviously he goes term and none term time.

What do I do he’s in a “contract” technically with the nursery. It’s currently taking 3 days wages to afford the £161 we pay now. I understand we use the government top up pot but he’s only claiming 20 out of the funded hours and I don’t know what to do!

Help!

How do people make marriages work

I got married to my husband when I was 17 he was 19. Got married cause I got pregnant with my oldest. My husband wasn’t faithful to me and years later I wasn’t faithful to him. I tried ending the marriage. But he wanted to try to make it work out. Well I have been trying but everytime I turn around my mistakes that I have made he throws them in my face or he will make comments about how I I haven’t messaged any other guys and all this and that. I’m so over it. I love my husband and I wanted to make it work but I’m to the point to where I just want to crawl under a rock and just let go. I feel like I’m not wanted and I feel like I’m an even worse mother. I’m on medication for depression and axienty but I haven’t been taking it daily I only take it when I feel like I need it. I just don’t know where I fit in in my marriage I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I’m 27 I have 4 kids and I just feel like I’m alone.

Stupid comments made by husbands

Anybody elses husband or significant other just make comments without ever thinking? have total foot in mouth syndrome or is it just mine? For example my friend and I were talking on the phone about how her baby daddy cheated on her after I got off the phone my husband proceeds to tell me that now that he is a dad he understands why men with kids cheat but he does not condone it. thoughts?

Going out

Where are you taking baby out atm while they are still just a few weeks old?

What age will you start taking them out properly e.g. to coffee shops, classes, theme parks (for older sibling), play dates, farm etc?