Does anyone else ever feel like the “disposable” friend?

Like you show up, you care deeply, you try to be there for people… but the moment you can’t give 100%, it’s like your value drops. Like you’re only needed when you’re strong, available, and pouring into everyone else. I’m the kind of person who responds quickly and will continuously be there. I just feel like it’s not reciprocated…

I guess I’m just wondering… how do you know the difference between outgrowing a friendship and just going through a rough spot?

Would love to hear from anyone who’s felt this way 🖤

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Yep think it plays into social dynamics and where you sit in that

Yes I feel like this… for instance I became really close to my partners cousin over the course of 6 months. We both had stuff in common which brought us together. My partner & I & the kids moved house ( only an hour away) and not once has she visited. We’ve been here 9 months. I think I’m not interesting to her now as I’m pregnant & can’t drink wine together like used to. She claims she’s “so busy” all the time & I’ve got to the point were I just don’t make plans to meet and neither does she… it’s sad really but I think it happens in life. I would say I consider friends as people who are mostly there when you need them and actively seek your company regularly not just when they are bored. I also think it’s hard to maintain adult friendships after kids and marriage etc x

I'm definitely the fringe/disposable friend
I'm never the one they call to hangout. I'm the one left out of plans. Gets cancelled on sort of thing. It makes me sad sometimes that I don't have any of those ride or die close friendships but I've kind of just accepted that maybe I'm not someone people want to be friends with 🤷

I have also been there. Especially in my 30s now, I find friendships shifting/changing. I have accepted that I don’t have friends from my childhood and I am aware that I have also been a pushover sometimes. I allowed a lot of things to happen and now that I have boundaries, friendships shifted. I also poured into friendships more than they poured into me. It’s probably now why I am more selective who I let into my little world. Sometimes friendships outgrow when you are on different paths. Sometimes there’s an invisible competition between you both that you didn’t know about. Some friends can grow jealous over certain things going on in your life. I also feel that certain friendships outgrow if your friend doesn’t see the new version of yourself and still expects you to show up as your former self. Sometimes it is communicating with your friend about concerns and no accountability has been taken. So many factors as to outgrowing a friendship.

If it is a rough patch, I do hope you can effectively communicate your needs to your friend and have a mutual understanding of the dynamics of the friendship

Especially so after I had kids and most of my friends did not.

in our community

Where are my sober moms at? No 420 and no other drugs

A lot of the people on here say they are 420 friendly. Are there any moms on here that don't smoke weed and don't do any other drugs? Yes. Weed is a drug. It might not be as strong as some other drugs, but it is still a drug. I do not do any drugs and I do not have any addictions of any kind. I never have. It makes me upset when I find out that some people did that stuff while pregnant. I live in GA and almost everyone who lives around me apparently either smokes weed or does other drugs.

Baby abroad with dad

I need genuine advice whether I’m being crazy.

BD wants to take our baby who will be 12 months at the time abroad to meet his family in Georgia. He currently has her every Sunday, she’s not even been round there overnight yet. This is due to drug charges and other reasons I won’t get into.

We don’t have a court order it is informal arrangent. I have done everything myself for the past 9 months, from sleepless nights, breastfeeding to weaning. I am the primary caregiver.

I am so filled with anxiety at the thought of her being without me for a week let alone abroad?! He’s kicked off and said I’m being unreasonable and it’s not fair.

Is this normal or what? Asking me for reasons why I’m not ok with that?

Am I the only one..?

Am I the only one that, sometimes, stop myself from saying something because if the other person has a different skin colour than me I fear they might take criticism as racism?

Am i a shitty mom

My son is about to be 9 months, and we currently live with his dad in a duplex. He doesnt work. If he does he works maybe 3 days and finds an excuse to quit. He says its not worth his time for what they pay. I work sunday through friday 5 am to 1:30 and i cant make ends meet. When i was on maternity leave he let bills rack up crazy and i had to use my whole retun to pay off the bills. And now ik the asshole because we obly jave about 200 dollars till i get paid again on the 18th. This is what he had to say when i complained that we wouldnt have had to use all of my return of he wouldve ketp a job that was perfect for our schedule and for our commute. He quit the job because they obly paid him 18/hr and he wasnt gonna do the job pf a machine for soemone who smokes a vape( he hates people who vape and his manager was doing so). Am i a shitty mom if i take my son away from his dad and run to harbor house? I just cant keep with financial abuse. I try everything to keep us above water and he just spits in my face about it.

Am I wrong

Sometimes I wanna tell my fiance to go eat out someone else since I'm tired or go have intercourse with someone else wrong for that🤔

What am I doing wrong in these convos

It hurts because I can’t even have a normal convo with this guy. Everything turns into me being the bad guy and I’m literally doing everything alone. I just want to feel okay.