Need 2 vent

I got pregnant with my baby daddy 2 months of knowing him🙄 stupid Ik but anyways when I was pregnant he would always bring up his ex drunk and sober. He would tell me that if she wanted him back that he would leave me and our son and just a lot of stuff like that .Part of me understands where he is coming from since they were together since middle school (9 years together) I stay because I really do love him but now I resent him. I used 2 love 2 do stuff for him. Have his clothes ready for him in the morning, make him food and every night I would massage his whole body. When we fight he is real quick 2 want 2 leave me and usually I beg him 2 stay but a few days ago when we were fighting I told him how come with your ex you stayed even tho she put you thew a lot and you are so fast 2 want 2 leave me . He told me because his ex was the love of his life and I’m just someone he got pregnant and he would never love me like her . Now I don’t see the point of doing stuff for him anymore. What should I do?

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

If you want you can dm me or virtual chat

I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

Maybe there is some truth in what he said. Maybe he genuinely did love his ex differently. But even if that’s true, it doesn’t make it an acceptable thing to say to the mother of his child. There’s a difference between being honest and being cruel. It feels more spiteful than productive, and I can’t imagine how painful that must have been to hear.

What stands out to me isn’t even that he’s hung up on his ex. It’s that he keeps saying things that make you feel insecure, then you’re the one left begging him to stay. That’s a really unhealthy dynamic, and nobody should have to spend their relationship feeling like they’re competing with someone else.

Please don’t stay purely for your child. Children learn from what they see. Sometimes being strong means making difficult decisions and showing your child that they don’t have to accept being treated poorly by someone they love.

Personally I would leave him. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this but he’s made it clear how he feels about you and your son…

I would leave him. He cannot keep dropping his ex in every time you argue. He's clearly not over her and saying things like that is just hurtful. As you love him it will be hard but I don't think it's going to change tbh. Stop doing the things you do for him. Look after yourself and baby only from now on.

leave

in our community

Feeling all sorts of ways- racial tensions

Anyone else feeling scared of the increasing intensity and frequency of race riots in the UK?

Also, before shit hits the fan like it does on other platforms (i can't believe) i have to say i think all perpetrators of violence are scum, whatever they may look like 👍

Would you describe yourself as..

Racist?
Obviously this is an anonymous poll so I wonder if anyone thinks of themselves as this? I’ve heard a lot of “I’m not racist but” then an obviously racist remark being said and wonder if people genuinely believe the first line they’ve just said. This is not to start an argument in the comments section…it’s I guess a fairly straight forward question.

Personal advice

I had a hunch so I checked my partners messages and he joined a porn sever and messaged one of the girls on there asking if her dms were open. Nothing happened but I'm still quite hurt that he even thought about messaging another girl. He said its because he lost control because I haven't done anything sexual in months (we have a 2 month old) idk if I can forgive and just need opinions

Break up or forgive?!

I just turned 8 months pregnant and I found out my baby daddy is on hinge.
He said he only went there because we had a little argument the day before and said he didn’t do anything.
Plus he had been texting other girls on instagram too!
He keeps saying sorry but honestly I don’t believe him no more, some of my friends say that I’m being to emotional because of my hormones. Honestly idk what to do!!! Mind this is the third time he messes up!🙄🙄
Should I break up with him or just forgive him???

Do you struggle with empathy ?

I feel like I really struggle having empathy for people, all I hear is aaa im a victim aaa im like this cos of this. I can really sympathise for people but I guess where I had it so tough growing up and into adulthood that I just get on with things yes it’s hard but I don’t ever use it as a excuse I use it as a reason to be better . I can’t stand weak people I guess that’s my problem! Does anyone relate or have any insight into this behaviour as I feel awful that I can’t give better advice other than suck it up be strong you can get through any thing !! 🙈

Help me

I recently discovered that my husband was cheating on me during my pregnancy and continued the affair after our baby was born. During the pregnancy he was cold, distant, and repeatedly told me he was “frustrated.” A few days after I gave birth, he told me he wasn’t happy and didn’t feel anything for me. I was heartbroken and scared.

I stayed with my parents for a few days, but he didn’t want me to return home quickly. When I eventually came back, I found messages confirming the affair. When I told my parents, they said they couldn’t help me and were more worried about social status than my wellbeing.

When I confronted my husband, he blamed me. He said it was my fault for not keeping him happy, that I should have expected it, and that he had done nothing wrong. He has shown no remorse, no apology, and he is still in contact with the other woman, who works with him and whom I knew professionally.

I feel trapped. I have no financial stability, no support from my family, and nowhere to go with my baby. Currently on maternity leave, I am worried if i go for a full time job then how will I look after my baby. All of my earnings have been invested into our property assets. I earn a basic wage, while he is carrying a significant amount of personal debt. However, he does have a stable job with a strong salary

I am trying to understand my options and find a way forward, but right now I feel overwhelmed and alone.