I’m new..

My oldest was born 6-17-17. Unfortunately I got into c*caine thru my ex w few years ago. I quit when I got pregnant w my next baby. But immediately back w it after (he was born 3.14.26). I’m 6 mos clean.

My ex had cheated so severely + I got w our dealer. He stopped dealing and we are both sober now. I now am the art teacher at a peer recovery center. I’ve lost a lot of friends.

Unfortunately most of my friends still use. Most of my friends aren’t parents.

I’m not a buzzkill.. I’m 420 friendly if you wanna do that, I’m ok w ppl who drink responsibly.

I just want friends who won’t judge. Friends who don’t use (marijuana and alcohol I’m ok w). Friends who are parents also in recovery etc etc etc

in our community

Ipswich, Is he cheating?

Hi,
I don't know if I am over worried or not. Here the fact:
My husband works near Ipswich since August, and I am in London with our children .
We have been using condoms since July as I gave birth. 5 condoms disappeared but I thought he brought them for a trip we did (we did not use them), but I never saw them again. Then 6 weeks later another condom disappeared (yes I am a psycho, I am counting our condoms 🫣). It is weird, but I was okay, it can still be explained!

This weekend he brought his bed sheets back for wash. I smelt a perfume that I don't know, it seems for me a woman perfume but I don't have a good nose. He has 4 pillow cases, it is really strong on one and it is not the one he using (his pillow case always have blood stains on them). I can smell it on the bed sheets as well but it is stronger on the pillow case.

What do you think? How can I discover if he really is cheating or not? He told me that he is not cheating on me, but I know that he can use language at his advantage at times (like he is not cheating right now but might have had).

I don't want to accuse him without strong proof.

Money during maternity leave

I need some advice, I’m still on full pay and send my partner £1500 a month towards bills etc and I get to keep £400 for the whole month. Am I being dramatic or is this not right? Baring in mind we have UC and he’s working full time. So he has the majority of the money and I’m left with £400. I’ve asked him about it and he said it’s more than enough to last the month as I’m not working and just at home. I’ve suggested a joint account which he was happy to open but it’s not happened. What should I do? Or say?

Tonies box opinion

Hi everyone, before I spend an arm and a leg on a tonies box and characters, what is everyone’s opinion on it. Is it worth its money? My little girl will be 2 at Christmas, she currently loves books and songs, so thought it might be a good present for her.

Also, if you believe is worth it, which characters are best in terms of what they do sing/read etc.

Thanks

Advice please.

I’m looking for some advice because I don’t know if I’m overthinking this or if other people would feel the same.

I’m due in December with our baby, but my partner and I have only had sex 3 times in the last 7 months. I know pregnancy can change things for couples, but it’s really started to eat away at me and has got me quite down.

It isn’t just the sex either. We hardly cuddle or kiss anymore, and I really miss feeling wanted and having that intimacy with him. He tells me he loves me a lot, and I don’t doubt that, but I was very open from the beginning that physical affection and intimacy are important to me.

I’ve spoken to him about it and even reassured him that sex isn’t going to hurt the baby, but nothing has really changed.

Another thing that bothers me is bedtime. The first thing he does when we get into bed is go straight on TikTok. He’ll say he’s tired, but then he’ll still lie there scrolling. To me, that could have been time for us to cuddle, talk or just have a bit of closeness before going to sleep. I’ve mentioned this to him multiple times as well, but again nothing has really changed.

Obviously my body has changed quite a lot during pregnancy, and I think the lack of intimacy has made me more self-conscious about it. I’m now getting to the point where I’m genuinely questioning whether I want him there when I give birth.

Birth is probably the most physically vulnerable and exposed I’m ever going to be, and when I don’t currently feel comfortable or intimate with him physically, I don’t know how I’m going to feel having him see me like that.

I’m not trying to punish him or use the birth against him. I just don’t know whether I’ll actually feel comfortable and supported with him there when there’s been so little physical closeness between us for months.

Has anyone else felt like this towards their partner during pregnancy? Would you still have your partner there for the birth, or do you think how I’m feeling is understandable?