Help PLEASE - nursery or career break?
My baby is a Velcro baby who I adore, I haven’t left him at all (apart from leaving him with his dad to go to the shops every now and again and twice to get my nails done twice). We moved away and have no family / friends who can watch him. He will be 1 in December.
I work from home with a well paid job (I’m a nurse so this is very hard to come by). If I do go back to work now it will be part time (2/3 days a week).
It gives me such bad anxiety and makes me so sad the thought of having to put him into nursery!! I worry he will think I’ve abandoned him and worry he won’t sleep or eat there. He is exclusively breastfed and we co-sleep. Only in the past week has my partner been able to put him to sleep for naps.
I can either put him in nursery in January 2026, when I’m due back at work, or take a career break for up to one year and start him in nursery in January 2027 (the nursery I really want him to go to doesn’t have a place until September 2026).
We don’t have tons of money but could get by on savings and my partner working. My dad has also very kindly said he can give £1000 a month for 1 year to contribute.
Do I take the career break now? Or do I wait? (If I don’t take it now I plan to take it when we have our second child which makes more financial sense). I can only take one career break with the company.
I think I would be happier sending him to nursery when he is 2 years old as he can hopefully talk by then and I can tell him what’s happening and that I’m not leaving him! But means I will have to send my second child to nursery when they’re 1 years old - if we’re lucky enough to have a second! I also don’t know if my dad will be able to provide financial help in the future if I turn down his offer now and go back to work.
Any suggestions with what to do would mean so much to me!
Thank you 🩷 xxx
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I am also very anxious about sending my velcro baby to nursery in Feb so I completely get this!
I would lean into your gut feeling which, going by this post, sounds like you might like to take the break now! Take advantage of your dad's generous offer and make the most of your first baby being little ❤️
I was so apprehensive about going back to work. LO was 13 months when I left her for the first time. It was a tough two weeks just on drop off but seeing how much she developed in the following few months I'm so glad I gave her the opportunity to experience other things. Still breastfeeding going on 22 months now. There's no right or wrong answer but it's OK to feel guilty. We can't always be there for everything
You have to do what’s best for you. My toddler (18 months), was/ is like your baby. I started to reduce breastfeeding in May as I was due to go back to work in June. Then it’s taken us until last week to completely wean off feeding and he wasn’t even that bothered! We weaned him over 6 months though. We tried to do it before but he just wasn’t ready. He started nursery in September and does two long days a week. He’s still settling in and it will take time but we’ve noticed such a difference in him. He interacts with children more now, his speech is rapidly developing, he plays better etc. him starting nursery has been incredibly tough as we’ve never left him before but I think for children like ours, they just take longer to get used to things and are maybe a bit more sensitive/ need more cuddles but in the end it is really beneficial for them and us. Us in terms of being able to leave them and having the confidence to do this, which in turn I think gives our LOs more confidence too
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Help PLEASE - nursery or career break?
My baby is a Velcro baby who I adore, I haven’t left him at all (apart from leaving him with his dad to go to the shops every now and again and twice to get my nails done twice). We moved away and have no family / friends who can watch him. He will be 1 in December.
I work from home with a well paid job (I’m a nurse so this is very hard to come by). If I do go back to work now it will be part time (2/3 days a week).
It gives me such bad anxiety and makes me so sad the thought of having to put him into nursery!! I worry he will think I’ve abandoned him and worry he won’t sleep or eat there. He is exclusively breastfed and we co-sleep. Only in the past week has my partner been able to put him to sleep for naps.
I can either put him in nursery in January 2026, when I’m due back at work, or take a career break for up to one year and start him in nursery in January 2027 (the nursery I really want him to go to doesn’t have a place until September 2026).
We don’t have tons of money but could get by on savings and my partner working. My dad has also very kindly said he can give £1000 a month for 1 year to contribute.
Do I take the career break now? Or do I wait? (If I don’t take it now I plan to take it when we have our second child which makes more financial sense). I can only take one career break with the company.
I think I would be happier sending him to nursery when he is 2 years old as he can hopefully talk by then and I can tell him what’s happening and that I’m not leaving him! But means I will have to send my second child to nursery when they’re 1 years old - if we’re lucky enough to have a second! I also don’t know if my dad will be able to provide financial help in the future if I turn down his offer now and go back to work.
Any suggestions with what to do would mean so much to me!
Thank you 🩷 xxx
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