I’m at breaking point
I need more support from my partner and he just doesn’t get it. He’ll help out then just go back to not helping. He works all the time. I’m stuck at home. He won’t let me go on a bus and he won’t let the baby go in other people’s cars and I don’t drive. I spend every minute and every day with the baby. He works a lot so when he has a day off all he wants to do is sleep or he says he’s going golfing. Where does my own time fit in? When he does make time for us, most of the time he invites one of his friends. Do you just not want to be around me? I feel like I’m being forgotten about by him and I’m irrelevant. Most of the time he’s the victim in the arguments because when I bring something up that’s upsetting me he turns it around and makes me out to be the bad person of that I’m the cause of everything. I understand that I maybe haven’t been showing up 100% but he struggles to understand the amount of responsibility that lies on me, the house, the baby, chores, remembering appointments etc. He’s suffered with depression so surely he can see that he’s just pushing me further and further away into a depression from his actions. I’ve told my mum I need more support and she is trying to help but as soon as I say oh can we reschedule one day she says that ‘I’m just trying to help and I don’t understand you’
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That's so tough, I'm so sorry you are going through that on your own! Not sure how receptive he'd be, but can you sit him down for a talk and fully put how you feel on the table, ask him on a day off for him to spend the day with the baby. He would need to be fully responsible for the full day to have a better understanding of what your day-to-day looks like. And you take that day to go visit with a friend, go to a spa day, or a day yourself doing something just for you. He can't call you to ask how to do something or complain he needs you home if he can't get baby to settle. Maybe even leave him a list of just a few of the main big chores you need to get done daily. It will also give you a day to yourself to step away for your own sanity. And don't forget, you have equal say! He may not want you on a bus or in other people's car, but you have just as much say. If you don't drive then you have to make other arrangements, not fair for him to keep you stuck at home. That for sure will not help anyone's sanity!
It’s hard to hear this… but he won’t get it.
I’m my experience, he would tell me I was being dramatic and way too emotional and then it came. The “I can’t do this anymore”… and just like that, he left. Bc he wants his own life back. Me and the baby just get in the way of ‘his life’. So, yeah. He left …. Divorce papers signed and everything simply bc he had enough.
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I’m at breaking point
I need more support from my partner and he just doesn’t get it. He’ll help out then just go back to not helping. He works all the time. I’m stuck at home. He won’t let me go on a bus and he won’t let the baby go in other people’s cars and I don’t drive. I spend every minute and every day with the baby. He works a lot so when he has a day off all he wants to do is sleep or he says he’s going golfing. Where does my own time fit in? When he does make time for us, most of the time he invites one of his friends. Do you just not want to be around me? I feel like I’m being forgotten about by him and I’m irrelevant. Most of the time he’s the victim in the arguments because when I bring something up that’s upsetting me he turns it around and makes me out to be the bad person of that I’m the cause of everything. I understand that I maybe haven’t been showing up 100% but he struggles to understand the amount of responsibility that lies on me, the house, the baby, chores, remembering appointments etc. He’s suffered with depression so surely he can see that he’s just pushing me further and further away into a depression from his actions. I’ve told my mum I need more support and she is trying to help but as soon as I say oh can we reschedule one day she says that ‘I’m just trying to help and I don’t understand you’
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