Mom in the room

I always thought I'd want my mom in the room when I gave birth. Now, I am really debating that decision. I love my mom. She has been there through everything with me. I have a very close relationship with her. But I also kind of just want my husband there. I'm not against her coming in to visit after the baby is born, but I don't know if I can handle her while in labor.

She is stubborn, opinionated at times, and can drive me crazy just as much as she can calm me, make me feel safe, and bring the comfort of having my mom there. I just know that I'll say one mean thing while in labor, and she will tell me to knock it off, or it's not that bad.

I also know my husband is going to be completely stressed out, and I know she will only add to his stress and possibly even frustration.

The problem is that I've already told her I want her there. I don't know how to tell her that I don't really want her there now. And what if I do tell her that and then I change my mind? She lives almost an hour and a half from the hospital. I'm just confused and scared. Help???

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Not to mention, my dad would be driving her there, and he refuses to come in the room. I don't want him in there either, at all. Not for labor anyway. I hate the idea of him sitting in the waiting room for hours and getting mad because my mom isn't sitting with him. My sister-in-law did that to them, and they still talk about it to this day. I know it's my choice and my comfort level, but I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

This is how I feel about my MIL. We're pretty close but at the same time she is also very opinionated...and I've already said that my MIL, my sister, best friend and niece could come while I'm in labor but as the actual time gets close I'm having second thoughts and just want my fiancé. I might just have everyone there to start with and if it's too much my fiancé said he will gladly kick them all out. I have allot of anxiety already. Idk about you but if they're far and your dad would cry and moan and not be understanding about having your mom there to give support then just forget about having anyone there except hubby. Or if you think you'll regret telling her no then talk to your dad about it too and clear the air before you have your mom come. Setting boundaries is an excellent way to have people on the same page.

i feel like this about my mom as well. i love her so much & we’re really close but the opinions & what not are too much. i’ve made the decision to have her in the room but as soon as i feel stressed out by her she has to go to the waiting room

Yeah, I don't want my mom in.. she stresses me out

Also having guilt about this … I know my mom wants to be there - she’s 4 hours away - I don’t even know how we’d plan that (I assume she’d have to come live w me 2 weeks prior to due date?) that’s asking a lot when
I’m already uncomfortable. I’m honestly hesitant to have any guests in house or hospital immediately before and even immediately after birth. Just so much going on I don’t wanna stress about someone else’s feelings or inclusion

If your not having a scheduled c-section and doing a vaginal birth, I would just go to hospital my hubby and I and once labor done and baby enter the world call her and your dad and be like it happened so fast I didn’t have time to call u but baby here so then she can do the drive down and she’s not in the labor with you and your dad not waiting for LO to arrive. Just a suggestion

@Lisa
My mom is staying for a month but I have a boundary. She is staying at my friend's house in her rv because I can't have someone else living with me during that time

@Paige I think you absolutely understand what I am talking about on a level that just makes me laugh. Thank you for sharing that.

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