Relationship advice

Hello, new mum here, my partner works loads of hrs as well, we both just come to an agreement of what’s best, we’ve never argued or fallen out.

through the week days when he’s working he will come home, he will then ask me if I need anything, or if I’d like to do anything before he plans to shower or anything. He will then watch her for the rest of the night if he’s playing on his Xbox so I can have some me time, the same goes on the weekends when he’s off as well. But he will ask me if he’s has to go out to do anything & if I’m also ok about him leaving for a few hrs.
In my opinion I’d say yous need to sit down & talk to one another & see what will work for you both. I hope this helps 😁

Im in the same situation, im looking after her all the time, doing nightfeeds so he can sleep for work, i get angry when he sits back after eating and says he needs a nap. Im the sleep deprived one for 4 months. He says he would much rather stay home and look after baby than go to work. Its impossible to get through to him that its not just feeding and sleeping. Its entertaining, doing all the bottles, also looking after a boisterous 1 year old dog that constantly requires attention. I also have ppd and ppa, cried asking him to take time off work, he said he knows i can handle it and i dont need him during the week.

Some men, unfortunately, are just emotionally challenged. Men can't understand but the emotionally intelligent ones might be able to empathise...

My husband is a lovely man, so great with the kids but he plays with them. The house can be falling around us and he doesn't see it, doesn't see the washing up, the clothes, the toys, any of it.

I really struggled with baby #1 and couldn't wait to have my own space once he came home. I had a velcro baby, never napped, exclusively pumped so was pumping, feeding and washing bottles and pump parts. It was awful. Hubby never understood either, and made comments about how much harder work was and how he would rather be home with the baby. I'm a lot better this time as that baby is now 2 and my new baby is an easy potato but my husband is still useless 🤣

You can try and sit down and explain but if he wasn't pulling his weight around the house before he won't be now... My husband's only saving grace is how great he is.

This is such a tough topic. How can he see that what you're doing is equal to a full time job plus childcare every other second of the day and what he has is an actual full time job plus childcare every other second of the day - v even in my opinion. I feel for you if that sense of responsibility hasn't come naturally for your husband how can you force it upon him. I would say I'm lucky in that my husband automatically goes above and beyond for our family but if that isn't a natural response how can you make a man want to do these things. V tough xx

Reading all these comments is like ready my own thoughts. This is exactly the same for me. My husband is a lorry driver Monday to Friday 7am till he comes home(Sometimes that’s not until 7/8pm). We argue all the time and I can be the smallest thing that will set it off. Like today he was asked to work a few hours which can happen and he always asks if it’s ok, I said yes of course as we are living on 1 paycheque and my crap maternity pay, we need all the money we can get, so I say that’s fine but come straight home after work. He called me in his way home saying he needed to pop to the shop and asked if I wanted anything for lunch, I said no I just want to sleep, I’m dead on my feet as it was a bad night with baby. He said ok I’ll be home soon,…
He then decided he was going to go into McDonald’s and sit down and have lunch!!!….
That flipped me off….. he didn’t seem to understand what the problem was.

Checkout Jimmy on relationships. He used to work full time and have a stay at home wife. And now he's a stay at home dad and wife works full time. He does some amazing content on how hard it is and support that's needed! Might help to hear a male perspective!