Time-out method at nursery

I wouldn't be happy about this at all and 100% talk to them

Which part are you upset by? The time out or lack of communication

I’d be upset about the lack of communication, but not by the time out if it was needed.

Id want to be told so that I can help reinforce the correct behaviour at home too, I see no issue with the time out. If my child was being pushed around by another I would hope that the nursery is taking actions like time outs or separating the kids

At my sons’ kinder they do have a quiet corner it’s called “chill time” or “reflection corner” w cushions and books, if any kids at any time feel like they want a lil quiet not to be disturbed that is their safe corner, as well as any kids that got reprimanded for anything that’s their corner they go to for timeout (they don’t call it timeout though) I think it’s a good idea for any child that needs a couple mins. They tell us through the app which kids went there on their own and which kids got sent there for whatever reason.

The amount of people in the comments thinking the only options are time out or let them carry on with the behaviour unchecked is crazy 😂

I’d be fuming about the time out and lack of communication, yes.

I like your parenting style incognito. I try my best to do these things, but I struggle at times.

We use time out but only started once my boy was 3. And we do it calmly, no raised voices or punishment, just time to sit and think for 3 minutes and also calm down. It really does help him calm down. I wouldn’t use it too young as not sure they understand. Our boy is 3 and nursery told me they were playing outside and he was hitting people with a stick so he got sent back inside and I was ok with it as actions have consequences but like I say, he’s older now, he’s 3.5 and we use time out at home so it is in line with what we do

I would find a nursery that aligns my educational values. I literally can't imagine my nursery doing this as I know they don't do treat to kids or whatever normalized educational violence. I would be fuming, talk with them first and if they think it's ok, change nursery

At home I rarely use timeout, but daycare is not home. They have lots of kids and little staff. Sometimes kids need to calm down away from other kids. The safety of the kids should always come first. You are overreacting here

I wonder if they would be ok with reframing it as the calm down chair? Once you reach the 2 year old class in our daycare they do have calm down chairs but they’re not like “sent away to the corner” by themselves, it’s with the support of an adult which I am actually ok with although I feel the same as you do with regard to time out. At home we call it “taking a break” and will often take my oldest to his room, but we always stay with him and support him through whatever the issue is.

It depends what your values are. I wouldn't have mine in a nursery that does time out as I don't believe it's effective and causes negative results but some people think it's a valid technique and wouldn't mind it being used.

I 100% see your point and I don't get why people in the comments are acting like you don't want them to do anything at all. There have been studies that show that time-outs aren't effective and if that isn't in your beliefs then you are 100% right to be frustrated at what the nursery did. As Skye said there are other methods that they can use without resorting to putting a child in the corner. AGAIN FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK, I am not saying do NOTHING... I am saying that as nursery staff and being around various ages of children and child development they should have other means. Such as verbally or whatnot

What makes you say toddlers can't reflect? Mine does. I'll tell you when she doesn't, it's because she's still in fight or flight mode, that doesn't make her incapable, it just means time out isn't always effective for encouraging reflection if the child isn't yet calm. The reflection comes after, when the 2 minutes is over and the time to themselves helped them calm down so that they can actually listen and reflect

At our nursery if an incident happens that a child needs removing from (hurting another, misbehaving or not listening during meal times/group time etc) they get “moved away from the group” for a minute. A member of staff stays with them but it just gives that child a little bit of time to calm down and reset ready to rejoin the main group. My LO is in preschool now though so some of this is in preparation for going to proper school.

Most of the time they don’t even end up being removed because they get given warnings and for the most part the idea of being moved away from the activity is enough to make the bad behaviour stop.

I’m confused why you did a poll considering you seem pretty dead set on your opinion. All the strategies are lovely in principle and no doubt backed by science. However, nurseries are usually consistently understaffed and incredibly busy. It’s logistically not always possible to do all the strategies you advise. Also Just because something is developmentally appropriate doesn’t mean it’s ok. Surely it makes sense that your child realises that if they act in a way that could cause harm to others there should be an appropriate response that discourages them from doing it again. I’m just struggling to understand why you’re so against it? What do you think would happen at primary school?

For anyone interested, my husband asked the room manager politely and indirectly if they are using this method and she denied.

I would not be happy with this at all. I've never used time out at home and I don't ever plan to. There are multiple other ways to deal with this situation so I would not have my child in a nursery that uses this very outdated and frankly ineffective strategy!

I forgot to add that I also am against time-out (sitting in the corner). We will take the reflection approach when the time comes for our son, so we are the same as you

I dont understand the comments saying "since when is it okay to push"? No one is saying that? People do realise there are other ways to approach a toddler misbehaving?