I don’t think I’m meant to have friends..
This is just me rambling and getting my feelings out so apologies if it’s a little jumbled.
At this rate I’m starting to think I’m not meant to have any meaningful friendships. I have always been the friend who reaches out first, plans the outings, host the monthly girls night, and makes an effort to be a good friend. So, lately I’ve stepped back and well, now my feelings are hurt. Bad.
It started a year ago. I was 9 months pregnant and told my group of girlfriends that I would not be able to host our monthly girls night. They all immediately chipped in saying they’ll take over while I navigate a newborn and motherhood. Fantastic! Not. No one hosted or even discussed it after that. But many of them made sure to mention they miss girls craft night and miss everyone and we need to do something soon. No plans occurred or were planned.
Now onto the biggest confirmation. My birthday was completely ignored/forgotten/skipped. This group of friends and I have ALWAYS celebrated birthdays. Whatever the birthday girl wanted. Movies, dinner, bookstore crawl, game night, paint pottery. It was done (within reason). But this year I was skipped. I was asked when and what I wanted to do. I gave them dates and told them just lowkey dinner and maybe a movie. Did I hear anything back? No. Did I ask? No, but how do you ask when you’re already struggling with feeling like an outcast?
I dont know if it’s hormones, my anxiety, or if I just give too much of myself to people. I want so badly to have friends who love and cherish me as I do for them. Someone who reaches out if they don’t hear from me for a day or two. I know being a mom is busy and hard but I can’t see how hard it is to send a simple text saying ‘hey, I’m thinking about you.’
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Oh, I know EXACTLY how that feels. I just got dropped by my "friends group" bc I set up boundaries for my family (they wanted to go to an OpenAir concert despite me having invited for a BBQ at our place at that day and couldn't understand why I didn't want to join when they cancelled on me). 🙃 I was supposed to just let it slip AGAIN and be "the easy friend" who always invites but whose needs or feelings were not as important as theirs. 😐 So I blocked them. I prefer meaningful friends. Greetings from Germany 🤝
Totally understand how you feel and your feelings are valid love. Personally, I'm terrible at keeping up in the beginning of friendships, but once I get to know my friends really good and we develop a deeper friendship, I can go all out. I still fumble (bc ADHD) but I definitely make the effort still. I'm here if you want to give friendship another try with new people x
I sometimes feel like this is the new direction of the world. People have gotten a little more self centered than usual. You are right to feel that way. People just don’t care as deeply as some of us do. They go on to live their lives uninterrupted while we sit there sad. They got used to you doing everything and they were just there for the ride. Were they really friends? Friends don’t do that. It’s one thing when one friend has stuff going on but a group of friends means someone should care. I’m sorry you are going through that. I may be in my feelings too because I choose to show up as giving and kind in this world and others are not always grateful but we just have to know someone out there will be a true friend.
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Where's my bestie😩
I am STRUGGLING. how are 35 yr olds supposed to make friends??? I feel alone. The friends I have are the ones you say you guys will make plans and never do. Everyone around here is so different from me. I play video games, they ride four wheelers, I listen to all music, they listen to country, I'm covered in tattoos and piercings, they have nothing, I have 4 kids they are just having their first. I have 6 dogs they have no pets. I want to find my person. The person I can share everyrhing with. Face time if we live to far apart, play games, etc. I need a Christina to my meredith 😂😂
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I don’t think I’m meant to have friends..
This is just me rambling and getting my feelings out so apologies if it’s a little jumbled.
At this rate I’m starting to think I’m not meant to have any meaningful friendships. I have always been the friend who reaches out first, plans the outings, host the monthly girls night, and makes an effort to be a good friend. So, lately I’ve stepped back and well, now my feelings are hurt. Bad.
It started a year ago. I was 9 months pregnant and told my group of girlfriends that I would not be able to host our monthly girls night. They all immediately chipped in saying they’ll take over while I navigate a newborn and motherhood. Fantastic! Not. No one hosted or even discussed it after that. But many of them made sure to mention they miss girls craft night and miss everyone and we need to do something soon. No plans occurred or were planned.
Now onto the biggest confirmation. My birthday was completely ignored/forgotten/skipped. This group of friends and I have ALWAYS celebrated birthdays. Whatever the birthday girl wanted. Movies, dinner, bookstore crawl, game night, paint pottery. It was done (within reason). But this year I was skipped. I was asked when and what I wanted to do. I gave them dates and told them just lowkey dinner and maybe a movie. Did I hear anything back? No. Did I ask? No, but how do you ask when you’re already struggling with feeling like an outcast?
I dont know if it’s hormones, my anxiety, or if I just give too much of myself to people. I want so badly to have friends who love and cherish me as I do for them. Someone who reaches out if they don’t hear from me for a day or two. I know being a mom is busy and hard but I can’t see how hard it is to send a simple text saying ‘hey, I’m thinking about you.’
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my husband and i are living in florida, my family all lives in ohio. i came to ohio with our daughter (he stayed in florida because he had to work) and ive really enjoyed it. i dont feel so lonely, in florida all i have is my husband, our daughter, and his mom. here the main person i have is my mom but she can help me and talk to me during times my husband is at work. i actually get to interact with more people go get out a lot more, it has been so nice. i miss my husband but i have been missing just spending time with my family / being around them. this was my first time my brothers, grandparents, and aunts have met my daughter. she is 3 1/2 months and we do plan to move back to ohio in the future, we are planning for before she starts kindergarten, but i just wish we lived here now. being back in ohio really makes me realize how much i miss it and how much i miss my family.
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